Of "It's a Shaadi World After All" -2

If you haven't read part one. I suggest you do that.

Now that you've read part one. I want you all to put on your Imagination Caps, or sit in your Imagination Boxes like this one:

I might sound like one of those hobos you see in weshtern moovish, the kind who warn people about the coming apocalypse. Well, since you've read part one, it won't be a huge surprise that I'll warn you about something related to Shaadis.

Lets get crackin' shall we?

Imagine one day, everything in world goes about their daily life as if they are attending a Pakistani shaadi. Here's how I suppose things would be.

Schools open at 8:00 AM sharp, yet the students show up by 11:00. Once they've had lunch, they go home, irrespective of on-going classes. Homework and assignments can be submitted upon entering the class wrapped in cheesy gift paper. And if you haven't done your assignment or were just lazy you can always hand in a glittery envelope with Rs.500/- in it.

Bombs with digital read-outs will slowly tick to zero, and won't stop no matter what you do. No amount of whining or crying or grumbling or moaning or snipping wires will suffice. Once it reaches zero it will explode after 3 hours or so. You never know the time. In rare cases it might just be a minute!

Speed of Light would be slower than the time it takes for the barat's arrival and the dhulan's makeup combined.

Pets you lavish with love would only stare at you till you give them food and then vanish until the next time they feel hungry.

Examinations will be filled in an undisclosed location (where only those people will be allowed whom the examiner chooses), after which the examine along with his paper will pose for photographs. No examiners will be allowed to appear in the photos.

People who are punctual will be screwed for the rest of their lives, always seen muttering under their breath "mein teen ghantey baad paida ho jata tau saab theek hota meri life mein.... LEKIN NEHI!"

I WANT TO SLEEP! ITS BEEN 30 HOURS SINCE MY LAST R.E.M. CYCLE.

(oh if you want to add something, leave it in the comments, I'll add it)

(Also, I had to get this out of my head. Sorry for putting you though this. Skip if you want.)