Of The Way I See It: Cellular Network Providers

So, at the moment, we have 5 ultra competitive networks in Pakistan, namely:
Jazz, Telenor, Zong, Warid, U-Fone.

And here's what I gather from their advertising campaigns.
(Once again, this is my view on it... like it? "yay" for you; don't like it, scroll down; still don't like it, click the reddish orange button on the top right of your screen)

Jazz: They're the all-rounders, all thanks to their vast coverage. you can stand, wearing a suit and a pagri(turban), on Mount Bleeding Everest (assuming it's within our borders) and you'd be able to call your begum (or shohrr) and ask what's for dinner. And thus if the food's not to your liking, you can proceed to hunt down a yeti and cook it (Quick Tip: turn your phone on silent, because when you do receive that maila londa call asking for Shumaila or get that annoying forward, the beeping will trigger an avalanche)

Warid: They are international, they have people dressed to impress, and that's about it... I rarely get to see an advert of theirs, though. Maybe if I do end up watching one I'd update this post.

Telenor: Their mission was to give the young, hippy, trendy, people of Pakistan the lowest call rates (taxes not included) They must have spent a fortune on their effects laden adverts. Then it was to impress people by having pretty boy Ali Zafar mimic high wire stunts from a bunch of old Chinese movies. So, you go:

• "O.M.G! Ali Zafar is flying thanks to Telenor! Lets Buy!"
• "O.M.G! Ali Zafar uses that package, I should really buy that!"
• "O.M.G! Ali Zafar is so popular amongst the ladies, guess it's all about your Mobile Connection after all. I'm SO Buying It!!
  

And similar declarative statements. However, that's no longer the case. Now, they focus on connectivity more than anything. Whether you are the old uncle who lives in the middle of nowhere and you want to talk to your city dwelling son who never calls you. Or updating your Facebook status while you're out camping or hiking. (Be sure to try the tasty Yeti Roast that Jazz User cooked if you're on Mt. Everest)

Zong: They aim to be the cellular service that is your Mohaley-ka-Bhekari's best friend. They quote prices from other networks and offer cheaper rates (Kinda like your typical desi housewife arguing with the local vegetable wala) So, if you're harassed by loans, credit cards, and what not.. Get Zong. It's so cheap that your Mohaley-ka-Bhekari, after he's given his day's earnings to his ustaad, can afford to prank call random numbers and Frandship laddiss.

U-Fone: These people know how to get their consumer base. They will make you laugh so much, that when you finally go to buy your SIM, you'd double over laughing at the very sight of their logo. Faisal Qureshi and the team make magic happen. I wonder what would happen if Shark/The Real News made a U-Fone CM.

(For the record, I use Telenor and U-Fone. Warid has awesome International Rates! I had Jazz, but it's covered in rust so yeah...)