Convulsion (n): A severe, often violent involuntary contraction of the muscles. Convulsions may be caused by high fevers or poisoning and often accompany such diseases such as epilepsy .
That is the generic definition of a convulsion. Then someone, please tell me: What on God's green Earth would possess you name your product "Convulsion You"??
You've all heard of the "Genie in the bottle" (not the song, sheesh) Well then, this is the "Death-Threat in a Lollypop"
Just look at the cute kid. Look at his eyes. Are they not the eyes of a serial killer? one who kills people by making them convulse. I wonder what their televised advert would be?
Announcer: Kids, are you tired of the boring old lollypops? Are your Chupa-Chups letting you down? * shows two blonde, blue-eyed kids nodding in agreement and making faces after licking their old lollypops *
Announcer: Have no fear, Convulsion You is Here!! * shows kids faces contorted in confusion *
Announcer: Convulsion You, the brand new lollypop from the makers of epilepsy, poisoning, alkalosis, diabetes, oxygen insufficiency, and brain injuries. It's gonna make your summers WILD! Have one today, and feel the bliss of violently jerking around without any control whatsoever * Kids faces light up. *
* Kids are handed a lollypop each. *
* Kids suck on them and develop convulsions. *
Announcer: Convulsion You! Get your Shake on!
Kids: Thanks Convulsion you!! * Kids suck on lollypops again *
That is the generic definition of a convulsion. Then someone, please tell me: What on God's green Earth would possess you name your product "Convulsion You"??
You've all heard of the "Genie in the bottle" (not the song, sheesh) Well then, this is the "Death-Threat in a Lollypop"Just look at the cute kid. Look at his eyes. Are they not the eyes of a serial killer? one who kills people by making them convulse. I wonder what their televised advert would be?
Announcer: Kids, are you tired of the boring old lollypops? Are your Chupa-Chups letting you down? * shows two blonde, blue-eyed kids nodding in agreement and making faces after licking their old lollypops *
Announcer: Have no fear, Convulsion You is Here!! * shows kids faces contorted in confusion *
Announcer: Convulsion You, the brand new lollypop from the makers of epilepsy, poisoning, alkalosis, diabetes, oxygen insufficiency, and brain injuries. It's gonna make your summers WILD! Have one today, and feel the bliss of violently jerking around without any control whatsoever * Kids faces light up. *
* Kids are handed a lollypop each. *
* Kids suck on them and develop convulsions. *
Announcer: Convulsion You! Get your Shake on!
Kids: Thanks Convulsion you!! * Kids suck on lollypops again *
--End Commerical--
Another thing. Have you ever come across people who look like their products? I mean, have you seen a Harland David Sanders who looks like a Crispy Broasted chunk of chicken? or a Dick McDonald looking like a Cheeseburger? No. Its impossible and really really stupid to think that such people can exist. But they do! Look:
Mr. Sunny here, looks like an Imli however you look at it! Okay, so either an overgrown imli or a really scary one with big big moustache. Scary. Don't you agree?
Another thing. Have you ever come across people who look like their products? I mean, have you seen a Harland David Sanders who looks like a Crispy Broasted chunk of chicken? or a Dick McDonald looking like a Cheeseburger? No. Its impossible and really really stupid to think that such people can exist. But they do! Look:
Mr. Sunny here, looks like an Imli however you look at it! Okay, so either an overgrown imli or a really scary one with big big moustache. Scary. Don't you agree?
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