Of Hot Bodies and Hotter Heads

I HAVE A FEVER!

102'F.

Have you noticed how people always quote their body temperature in Fahrenheit to make it sound cooler. I mean can you imagine telling another human being that your body temperature is 39 Celsius?

Me: Yo Dude! I've got a bitchin' fever!
Dude: Yeah? What's the Temperature?
Me: 39! DUDEEEE its 39'C!!
Dude: Errrrr
*Dude now wonders to himself whether he should be concerned or not.. cause 39'C is not as shocking as 102'F*

And now, I quote Aisha
"Shockerzzzz"

Of Grapes that Taste Like Wine.

So, my friend read the Emo post, and maybe that had an effect on her. Because 5 minutes later she was going on about she had vine grapes, and how they were so delicious... and how the grapes tasted like wine. Another universal truth, we have stumbled upon.



Sometimes she says the weirdest things. YAY!

Of Ferocious Pets

I GOT A WOLF AS A PET!!! YAY!

Now be nice to him. Okay?

Of Emo people.

I have no beef against Emo people.

See, there is a limit to being Emo. (Isn't Emo a genre of music?) I admit, I have nothing better to do then spend time looking at blogs of people I know, or people who have mutual people in common with me. Point is, there is seriously something wrong with the kids born in the years after mine. The younger crowd has gone really really pathetic. Possibly they've been following instructional videos on How to be Emo.

Take for example, Random Guy on my MSN.
So this guy is perfectly normal, though he has an obsession with taking pictures of himself with eyeliner on, and then turning them into black and white pieces of "questionable" art. Sure, occasionally he'll wear a studded wristband which looks like it used to be the collar of a very mean (and very skinny) dog... possibly named Spike. Now this guy has been sporting this quote on his MSN for the last week.

"I wanna slit your throat and fuck the wound.
I wanna push my face in and feel the swoon..."

So, I asked him why he kept it as his nick, because, every time he'd sign in I'd feel nauseous and my neck would slightly itch. His reply? "My girlfriend likes it. Hence I put it up." Man that girl is seriously messed up. And so is the guy. What girl would want her throat slit and the have the guy (who just slit her throat) have sex with her throat?? (I know that they are lyrics to Slipknot's "Disasterpiece" - Google FTW!!)

Similarly, I was trolling around Blogger and I came across a blog (whose link I'd love to give you, but I can't due to some reasons). The blog had emo/goth written all over it. And you guys know how emo people can go all deep and shit on you? Well this person had a post with just one line written in it:

"A happy person is an unhappy person having fun."

Man, that is so deep. Like totally. I mean, look at it. An unhappy person starts having fun, and *poof* turns into a happy person. WOW! Coincidentally, I was talking to a friend, and she had a blast with this line. I mean, look at what you are writing. Does it even make sense? What if you are at a celebration and someone asks you to introduce yourself. You in your eye-lined eyes, stare down at the room and go "My name is not important. I look happy.... but I am an unhappy person.... having fun.... bring me my razor"

Man I wish I could come up with deep and thought-provoking stuff like this guy...

(Hope you liked the instructional video)

New Blog Header!

YAY! I made a new blog header today. It took me ages, (well 15 minutes) and I Google-ed all my images, but it was worth it. I always felt that my blog needed a more serious header. So, I worked hard and made this amazingly serious header. YAY!

Though, I have to admit. The Radioactive Potatoes coming down from the mothership, look more like the mothership shitting them out. Just a random thought.

I havent slept yet, so I cannot say if the Tellytubbies will pay me a visit or not.

Cheers for today!

Nightmares and Ocular Consumption by Cyborg

So. Last night was a good one. I finally got to see Robocop 3 (for the 5th time). Man! I love the movies. Robocop is such a badass. The way he rips off the top of his car just for the heck of it. Calls everyone a scumbag. I mean almost everyone. And the puns, they are just the best.

Robocop: [with flamethrower arm in police station] "You may want to call the fire department."
And a while later, one of the so called baddies is asking around for a lighter, Robocop shows up at the door and says "Allow me, Scumbag" and sets the guy's desk on fire.

See. Coolness. Yeah. Now, if someone was probably going to make a remake of the Robocop franchise, they would definitely add a crap load of CGI, superb special effects, loads of action sequences. I admit, Robocop would attain a new level of coolness, but at the same time, he'll lose all the cheesiness that the movies have. He'll probably turn into this searching-for-his-humanity-crime-fighting-cyborg rather than the badass he is.

Oh, last night, around 3-ish i woke up. I would have blogged this then, but my eyes were itchy. I had the weirdest dream. Long story short; Robocop killed me, and ate my eye! Okay, so my nightmares usually involve some disturbing thing (obviously, hence the term nightmare) but this was well, pure What-The-Fuck of a dream. I woke up confused, and i thought to myself, "why the eye"?

I told Amby about the dream and her reply was, well, apt: "of all things macabre you see robocop!"

Now lets hope Tellytubbies don't turn into serial killers.

"Tinkie Winkie, I Keel Yew!" *giggle/chuckle*

Of Catching Trends and More Strikes

What you see is the door to the ATM Room of Muslim Commercial Bank. What you see written on the door is "14th July Dharna Hoga"

Dharna means a sit-in, a non-violent protest.

So, I suck as a reporter. Fine. But atleast i got this picture. See, the trend is catching up. The Trend where you deface property just to make a stupid announcement. First this bank, then PTCL... Next thing you know, people will start spray painting all sorts of announcements. Like Chase Department Store in Boat Basin will spray-paint "Closing Down Sale. Everything Must Go" on their shutters. and on the pillars in front of the shop.
(Chase is a department store which has a sale every day throughout the year. They have roughly 5 closing down sales every year. And they change the type of sale - closing down, new year, summer, spring - when the previous banner gets too tattered.)

Example of Trend in effect
A family is about to engage their daughter. The father and brother go to the hardware store, and buy cans of red, gold, black and green spray-paints, and spray on the wall outside their brand new house "Tomorrow, on the [date], there is an engagement in this house!" Then the females of the house decorate the wall with typical henna designs (with spray paints obviously). See? For a few hundred bucks you save thousands you'd normally spend printing elaborate cards which everyone throws away after the event.

Speaking of which, my birthday is coming up. I should go and spray paint on my wall announcing to everyone that my its my birthday. Hopefully someone would show up with a present or two.

* Goes off to buy Spray Paints *

Of Webcams and Sexy Chat

Woah! I just had my first offer for Dirty Webcam Chat.

So, here I was, just finished my last post. Took a breather and listened to some music. Got some food, and when I come back, I see some Elinor chick has added me on MSN. Who is this girl? Do I know her?

The following is an excerpt of the conversation that took place. (well actually it's the entire conversation)

Elinor: hey
Me: hi
Elinor: Age/Sex/Location?
Me: 20/M/India
Elinor: hey whats up babe, U got a webcam? finally someone adds me, I am soo fuckin horny today for some reason lol
Me: * yawn *
Me: Indulge in self love please.
Me: bye
Elinor: listen hun, I am just about to start my webcam show with jen, come chat me there in my chat room? We can cyber, I will get naked if u do..lol!

Damn. What if she was a hot chick. I mean, hot chicks rarely throw themselves at me. The ones who do, have some weird problem which ruins it all.
(add her: elinorcyhapod@hotmail.com)

And what is wrong with her? Is she trying to seduce me, or make me laugh? "I'm horny for some reason...LOL" Man. She needs practice at this. pfft. Waste of time.

And, just to satisfy my curiosity, if you do add her, lemme know how many times she's laughed while trying to turn you on.

Cheers

Of Innovative Wall Graffiti

Oh Goodie!

Today was exceptionally interesting.

The phone's been dead for over a week now. So we finally decided to go to the PTCL (Pakistan TeleComm Limited)'s office and file a complaint. It's 1:30 in the afternoon and their office is closed. There is no one there. One lone guard is the only sign of life in the vicinity. The building looks abandoned. No, honestly, it does! The following is my convo with the guard... (with the English translation in brackets)

Me: "Bhai Saab, Yeh office kiyun band hai? Kahin shift ho gaye hain kiya?" (Yo brother! Why is this place closed down? Have they moved to some other location, yo?)
Old Guard: "Beta, aaj strike hai. Kal aana." (Son. Today they are on a strike. Come Tomorrow.)

-- Now usually people would leave the matter here. Not me--

Me: "Aacha tau bataien, kis cheez ki strike hai?" (Tell me, what's the strike about?)
Lonely Guard: "Strike hai" (Its a Strike)
Me: "Lekin Kis cheez ki strike hai" (But what for??)
Weird Guard: "Strike hai beta. Bahir deewar per likha hai" (Son, its a strike. Its written outside)

-- So I look around trying to find some notice or something telling me about the reason... and I see this:

Yes Ladies and Gents. Spray painted on all the walls was "UPS Payscale Namanzoor Namanzoor!" (Namanzoor meaning Unacceptable)

See! The creativity! The innovation! A banner would have cost them more. Why not just spray paint the message on the wall. Defacing the property. (Well at least no stupid gangs get to tag the wall now)

Though I am pretty sure, our dead phone somehow fits into their strike scheme.

Of More Japanese Dramas

THANK YOU AISHA!

Thanks to her, I'm gradually progressing into the JDorama scene. YAY!

Currently Watching: Hana Yori Dango!