Of Shock and Betrayal

Today, I went to a second-hand bookshop. See, I have this thing, where I start obsessing about books I desperately want to read, but Murphy beats me to it - Murphy being of the "Murphy's Law" fame. I mean, the books I like, are so hard to find its not even funny.

Case #1: Bourne Identity - Robert Ludlum.
I saw the movie, and I heard from a friend that the book is so totally awesome. So, I went on Amazon, read the review, and fell in love with Jason Bourne. Now I kept trying to find the book but to no avail. I took the phone numbers of every major bookstore in my city, and I kept calling them and running to from one bookstore to the other for well over a month just to get that book. I finally got it. Man! It was So Definitely Worth the effort

Case #2: Shogun - James Clavell
Same story here. This time, I had the numbers so i started calling up well in advance.

Case #3.... ENOUGH! No more cases. you get the point. Fact is, today I was betrayed. by my somewhat favourite childhood author: Roald Dahl.


Roald Dahl published an adult book? I never knew that! So I went home and Wikipedia-ed the title. The storyline shocked me. Uncle Oswald discovers the world's most powerful aphrodisiac and with the help of a woman, he seduces all the famous figures in history to give their sperm to him, which Uncle Oswald later sold to women looking to be impregnated by the said celebrities. His victims included: Pablo Picasso, Sigmund Freud, Albert Einstein, H. G. Wells, Rudyard Kipling, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, George Bernard Shaw, etc.

How twisted was the guy? I wonder what was going on in his head when he was writing the B.F.G or Charlie and the Chocolate factory? Was Willy Wonka (GOD! He's called "willy!" How could I miss that??) really a Michael Jackson of the past? Was the B.F.G. really a pedophile peeping into little girls rooms when they were asleep? Was George really making an aphrodisiac in "George's Marvellous Medicine? I shall never look at his books the same way again.

Of Green Men Rescuing Cats.

Hulk Smash!

HULK CRUSH PUNY SPIDER!

RWWAAARRRR

That is possibly the entire vocabulary the Hulk has, according to Stan Lee. He's violent, has anger issues, and can destroy an entire city if he wants to.

Ladies and Gents. Feast your eyes on the gentle giant. "Hulk the Hero"


Now, tell me, what in hell did was the author of the book thinking? Oh look! Bruce Banner sees a kitty stuck in a tree. He tells a random passerby to punch him repeatedly in the crotch. Bruce gets angry, turns into the Hulk, smashes a couple of cars, then rips the tree (with the cat in it) and throws it across the street. calms down and turns back into Bruce Banner and helps the kitty. So, Hulk smashed a million dollar's worth of property and injured countless people, just to save a kitty.?

They ruined a violent hero by showing his soft side. I wonder if Batman would ever save a cat. Probably he'll fly his Bat-Glider up to the tree, and harpoon the branch, tow it in, and then land the glider on some poor soul's car.

Of Squeaky Witches and Nokta Phones

Sunday Bazaar is like heaven for anyone who wants to shop in a budget. You get almost anything there, like books, stationery, crockery, cloth, decorations, furniture, etc. And all is reasonably priced too.

What I love about Sunday Bazaar is the Rs. 10/- Stalls. I mean you can get pretty much anything there; knives, hair ornaments, elastic, machine oil, and the weird stuff! The Weird Stuff is the heart of the Rs. 10/- Stall. You get the world most adorable keychains, games, puzzles etc.

These two are self explanatory. I did find a wristwatch like roulette wheel. Will be uploading its picture the next time I go to Sunday Bazaar.

I talk about nonsense..... don't I?

Of Crows, and Super Duper Action

Man. I know, I should be studying, but.... Man! It's Karas we are talking about! Think of the Japanese version of Batman. This guy is the coolest. I mean, morphs into a car, a plane, and a superb warrior. Not to mention his costume is the sexiest thing you'll see (No, Batty-Fans, thankfully, Karas' costume lacks nipples). Karas is pure EYE CANDY. The closest I can describe it is, imagine a dark power ranger who can transform into a Bat-Mobile-esque car and your generic fighter jet with mystical bullets. Now imagine a high speed dog-fight up in the stratosphere, and suddenly Karas turns into a samurai type warrior (in mid-air) and exchanges sword blows and fisticuffs with his opponent. and then transforms back into a plane and resumes the fight.

I suggest you all download and give it a go. There are two separate movies, Prophecy and Revelations. Watch Prophecy first, just to get a hang of the Karas plot line. The second movie, Revelations is the best ending you could have hoped for. Not to mention, the visuals are pretty much high-def, and the soundtrack really gets your heart racing during those intense sequences of pure drool-worthy action.

A definite watch for any anime fan.. I'm off to watch it again!

(This was an un-asked-for promotion of the Karas Franchise. I did not get any money from anyone for this)


(Ooooo lookies! A 20 Rupee note!! Yay! I bees rich agains)

Of Mickey Mouse and Pole Photography

I just transferred today's pictures on the computer, and this one is a must see! Mind you, this picture is today's And it just makes you think what was this guy thinking? The one i refer to is in the background wearing the Mickey Mouse sweater. Everyone's sweating like crazy and this guy wears a sweater. People, beat the crap out of him. We are losing precious bodily fluid and he mocks us with his Oh So Retro Sweater. He was giving me a mean look so I pretended to take the picture of the numbers written on the pole.

Oh, and why is the guy sitting on the bench smiling? Errrr... Okay! I'd rather not know.

Of Innovative Transvestites.

Ladies and gents. These days, we face a serious crisis. Transvestites, and people dressed as transvestites. Didja know, ever since that creep Begum Nawazish came on T.V. more and more transvestites on the streets begging.

You can bet half of them are perfectly normal guys, who could be working but, they have to find an easier way of earning money.

Okay, so most of the Pakistani population (The educated ones atleast) are freaked out by the very sight of transvestites, So we get rid of them. The man portrayed in the picture is one of the more prime examples. Not only does he have two perfectly able legs, he's got a deep manly voice (which he does nothing to disguise), and he's got a crutch that he uses to lean on. (the crutch serves like one of those walking sticks that you use for show)

I get the fact that people will do anything to make ends meet. But, pretending to be a transvestite? That's low.

Oh and I have no idea if this person was really a man or not. I took the picture after seeing him use his crutch as a walking stick.

Of Obesity by Willingness

The other day, I was buying my Gran's monthly supplies of meds and stuff (Yeah.. ain't I such a sweet heart?)

Anyways, next to the meds was a shelf dedicated to health products and stuff. And this caught my eye.

We proudly present to you: "Mega Man Junior: Body Building Formula for your Munna"

Man. The Americans are worried that their kids are growing obese and we are making products that make our kids obese. Yaar, shove a McDonalds down their throat every day. Just look at the box. That fat kid punched his way through the box just to be on the cover! And though you can barely make them out, the kid has BOOBIES. And I am really sorry, makers of "Mega Man Junior" but that kid doesn't hold any semblance to a muscular figure, ITS FAT. LARD. BLUBBER. I can show you 10 kids who are like that without touching your product.

And honestly, do we really need 'pehlwan' kids? Wont they just turn into bullies? Or big blubbery kids with a soft center who get picked on by everyone. As Nadia's Driver said to me once, "Beta, Jaan banani hai tau do roti khao, rozana." Feed the kid two rotis and not fast food if you want him to get strong. Or, throw things at him so he gets good at dodging blows. I happen to be a sucessful dodger, thanks to Oji-san.

And sorry for the picture quality. It's hard taking covert pics with a cellphone.

Last Day of Work / Stress Relief

Today was the last day of work. YAY

It was fun. We didn't do much. Just fooled around, cleaned our cupboards (I don't even have one!) Ate food someone bought as a treat.

So, now what to do, if you are wasting time trying to get through the day. Your mp3-player s out of juice. You annoy people. Yeap. That's what you do. That, or make tall towers with chairs lying about. Look! That's is not me, but the librarian. I like using people as models for my pictures. Hey, if Shahrukh wasn't so sensitive, I have a few pics of him modelling for me that I would love to put up

Oh. Crisis report: There are quite a few people getting the sack at school these days. I hope I don't come in the crossfire. I mean, I take my job seriously (Not counting this goof-off)

I'm Tired. I have a paper tomorrow. I need to sleep.

Oyasumi Nasai!

500 Posts a Day? Hanya?

A while ago I was tinkering with the settings of my blog, making it look more drab (in futile hopes that people would take me seriously) And I came across the 500 posts per day limit.

Wow. So, if you set the your blog to display your posts day wise, each day would be limited to 500 posts. Show me two people who publish 500 (or more) things a day, and actually have something to say... emo-pana doesn't count.

....

No? Thought so! So why even enforce such a stupid limit?

Bleah!

Of a New Beginning

Till a while back. My blog was all about ruthless propaganda against the handful of people I detest.

Enough of the mud-slinging. I spent an age cleaning the blog to make it public friendly. Why clean it and not just delete it? Because I liked the layout and I didn't want to spend time making a new one.

So. I guess I lost most of my readers.... (did I even have any?)

Anyways. I shall serious blogging, about serious issues....

Yeah Right! "Radioactive Potatoes Will Enslave Us" sounds like such a serious blog na?